i know i am a move-on-quicklie person. i know i am able to let go in jux a flash of thunderlite and pretend that it all never happen. i know i can juz look at him as a friend and nothing more. i know i can juz look at her as someone great that make him fall in lurve with and say nothing about it. i know i will stil luff and joke and be crazie and hyper like i am. i know i am not a cryin-over-spilled-milk person. i know i am not those who goes "i should have..." i know i will be betta off without da constant fear and insecurity. i know itz just an act out of infatuation and impulse. i know itx juz fate playin a joke on us. i know. i seriouslie do know.

but still, i karn help to feel regret when i made that choice of lettin him go. i know it sounds stupid. but i should have trust him. i should have give him da chance to prove himself. i should have given myself a chance to taste what'z da feelin of bein in lurve again. i should have tell him that i'll be there.

i shouldn't keep givin him confused signalz thinkin that i am not interested. i shouldn't have doubt him. i shouldn't thought that he'z those unable-to-settle-down guy. i shouldn't guess like i'm in a guess show about his feelingx. i shouldn't be so protective over myself, afraid to fall in lurve, afraid to give everythin i have, afraid to get hurt.

yes, i do forget what izzit like to like someone so much, euu can do anything for them. i do forget what izzit like to have someone to lurve and care fer euu. i do forget how lurve feels. in simple, i forgot lurve.

nope i'm not blamin anione here, but i dun blame muhself too. it feels good to be single, but when i think back, i will always ask myself da question. what will we be now if i mek it there that day? euu onlie need one decision to mess euur whole entire life. and i had make one entire hugeeeee mistake and i know i will never forget myself fer it.

but then, i know i am not gonna cry like crazie and started feelin sorrie and sympathy fer muhself. tek this as a lesson, and never repeat da same mistake. fer those who are in lurve with each other but are still playin mind game, MAKE UP EUUR OWN MIND. do euu wanna let it go, and regret after that? life'z nort fer euu to regret. eu dun just make a mistake, ng, and then think that euu can rewind da tape and start it all over again. that'z nort life. euu are suppose to throw euurself in da circle, and if euu get hurt, heal, and then throw euurself back again. if euu found someone who happens to be euur other half, keep him nice and safe.

dun ever stay outside da circle, cause there'z too manie possiblitiez. dun ever sae euu will never do somethang, cause euu mite just do that thang at da next minute. dun ever sae euu will hate or lurve someone forever, for there'z no such thingie as forever, and euu are onlie breakin euur promises in da end.

yup, i dun believe in forever. and i alwaes sae "it'z now or never." i rather have just that one tiny moment of memory than to have nothang at all. i dun sae stuffx like i wil lurve euu forever, but i'll lurve euu fer as long as i can. there's no friendz who can last forever, but i'll be euur friendz as long as i have one breath, and i will never walk away. i'll never give up on euu.

i know i am nort reallie sad that we didch end up together, but i do regret of da decision. i swear that ever, ever i met a guy and i do lurve him, i'll make sure i'll be clear with muh feelingz. lastlie, i want him to be so happie with her. happier than what i can give him, so he would not regret like i do now. i mite be cursin at her out of fun or jealousie, but trust mie, i dun mean it. i will alwaes remember him. =D

wow. i had grew up!


*mwahs @ 11:42 AM